The List

Today I found a note in the parking lot of a supermarket.

It was a list.

A shopping list.

And I can’t help but imagine this family’s life.

Did the wife stay back and send her confused hubby out in the cold to rummage through Stop & Shop for duck legs and Diet Mist Twist? What the heck is Mist Twist?


The arrows are super important for this husband. I hope he took the bait and “Mist Twisted” the list over to the back.


What qualifies a bag of oranges to be good? Do they have to get straight A’s or help little old ladies cross the street? He must’ve grabbed a bag of oranges from the wrong side of the produce department on his last food run. I mean, look at how hard she drew those arrows? I’m surprised she trusted him enough to handle this task on his own.

PICTURE IT: He goes out in the 20 degree tundra gripping his snarky list with symbols and question marks that confuse the sh*t out of him. When he pulls up to the store, he tosses his note to the ground and spitefully storms over to the bags of dangerous fruit.

I wish I knew the outcome to this story, and more importantly if he decided on getting those duck legs!

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